catch-22
as much as my minds been kinda blank these past few weeks..suddenly i find myself thinking awfully a lot these past days..thinking about where i am in my life right now..you know doing sorta like a systems check.. i guess its the time of year aside from new year when we look back at our lives and ponder about whats gonna happen ahead...yep, its gonna be my birthday=P
man, im turning 22..but why do i still have a mind of a 5 YEAR OLD... aargh! i dont wanna go old!!..kidding aside, i don't think ive changed a bit..although these past couple of days im starting to scare myself by thinking way ahead.. im starting to worry where i will be 3-4 years from now; what my life will be down the road; starting here til i reach the big 3-0(yikes!)..the questions keeps piling up like "what will i do after college", "will i be able to quickly land a job after i graduate and if i did what would it be?"..."will i be married? will i have kids?" stuff like that..
man, im turning 22..but why do i still have a mind of a 5 YEAR OLD... aargh! i dont wanna go old!!..kidding aside, i don't think ive changed a bit..although these past couple of days im starting to scare myself by thinking way ahead.. im starting to worry where i will be 3-4 years from now; what my life will be down the road; starting here til i reach the big 3-0(yikes!)..the questions keeps piling up like "what will i do after college", "will i be able to quickly land a job after i graduate and if i did what would it be?"..."will i be married? will i have kids?" stuff like that..
where do you think youll be 3-4 years from now?? what are the things you want to do or accomplish before you reach 30?
scared as hell...
ive also realized that the real/business world can really be scary. of course i already knew that from the stories and the experiences ive heard from other people back then, but i really never have thought about it,thinking that it will take a long time before i get there..and now that im on the edge, it feels like jumping from a very high place and you dont know where you'll land-- it really scares the hell out of me..after i graduate, it would be a whole new world out there; that the once comfortable feeling that i have in college will disappear,that my once reliable and dependable safety net will be gone for good.. but just as how scared i am, my excitement equals it..i cant wait to get out there and show them what ive got; what im made of..especially to those who doubted in me, to those who thought i can never make it..
in conclusion
after all the thinking and the flashbacks (sounds like a movie) ive realized something; that my whole life has always been a big catch-22 (pasok ba?? hehe) seriously though that no matter how perfect or ok i thought everything would be, something always pops out and ruin it..that i always encounter a situation that will make whatever i want impossible..that when i really really like something/someone, theres always like this huge problem---like a big obstacle before it.. in short, it never was a smooth sailing for me (arent we all??)..im not whining, na realize ko lang (ang slow ko talaga)..yeah i know, that the problems will make the person/thing that i wanted much more worth it, that thats whats makes life so beautiful..but then again hey its just me kaya anlabo..malabo talaga ako =)
ive also realized that the real/business world can really be scary. of course i already knew that from the stories and the experiences ive heard from other people back then, but i really never have thought about it,thinking that it will take a long time before i get there..and now that im on the edge, it feels like jumping from a very high place and you dont know where you'll land-- it really scares the hell out of me..after i graduate, it would be a whole new world out there; that the once comfortable feeling that i have in college will disappear,that my once reliable and dependable safety net will be gone for good.. but just as how scared i am, my excitement equals it..i cant wait to get out there and show them what ive got; what im made of..especially to those who doubted in me, to those who thought i can never make it..
in conclusion
after all the thinking and the flashbacks (sounds like a movie) ive realized something; that my whole life has always been a big catch-22 (pasok ba?? hehe) seriously though that no matter how perfect or ok i thought everything would be, something always pops out and ruin it..that i always encounter a situation that will make whatever i want impossible..that when i really really like something/someone, theres always like this huge problem---like a big obstacle before it.. in short, it never was a smooth sailing for me (arent we all??)..im not whining, na realize ko lang (ang slow ko talaga)..yeah i know, that the problems will make the person/thing that i wanted much more worth it, that thats whats makes life so beautiful..but then again hey its just me kaya anlabo..malabo talaga ako =)
help??
btw does anyone know blog html?? coz i kinda have a prob here...my sidebar page seems to be too far down, tried a lot of stuff but to no avail..kindly appreciate your help..
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